Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Every time I leave for my lunch break, a tree screams in agony



Today I stood by the napkin dispenser in my work cafeteria and watched approximately how many napkins my fellow employees help themselves to at an average lunch visit.

Appalling. What kinds of human beasts are you? Seven napkins? SEVEN? One guy just took and took and took until he had what looked like a miniture paper towel roll which he wound around his hand before departing for his trough upstairs.

They generally don't serve bison ribs swimming in barbeque sauce in my gourmet cafeteria. So I have to ask, what is WITH people and the need to horde piles and piles of napkins? Wasteful.

12 comments:

Mister Underhill said...

Perhaps they take them home and burn them in the fireplace for warmth?

redpants said...

Please. You know you're working for a global corporate entity that probably does a lot more heinous things than wasting napkins. The guy you watched take seven napkins most likely spent the morning putting the finishing touches on a deal that will enable coral reef strip mining and some form of genocide. And you probably helped make a nice cover page for said deal. Maybe you can wipe the blood off your hands with only two napkins, but that doesn't give you the right to throw stones.

Krissyface said...

Redpants, you are a terrible person.

Cindy-Lou said...

Maybe the restroom is out of TP.

Scooter said...

Actually, we are literally drowning in "fiber" these days. Paper is a renewable resource. Seriously, companies like Georgia Pacific get so much use out of their farmed, yes, FARMED trees, along with the huge amount of recycled newspapers, cereal boxes, and everything else, that taking seven napkins that are either from recycled fiber, or from a tree planted to be intentionally harvested...

Don't worry about it. Hey, think of it this way. A wood-frame house is a carbon dioxide sink. The trees were planted by a company, sucked up a lot of carbon, were cut down a few years later, and now hold all of that carbon and at the same time provide shelter.

Using a few extra paper napkins really doesn't harm the environment as much as it helps North American business.

Krissyface said...

I give up.

BUMBLE!!! said...

And here's another thought for them - if you don't use them, leave them on the table.

And for those people too "proper" to use UNUSED napkins sitting on a table, may you be forced to sit in a clearcut area and inhale the gasoline smell from what was used to burn out all of the stumps for replanting tree farms.

Bastards.

Scooter said...

Well, granted, there are better ways to do anything, including tree farming. Burning tree stumps is rather silly, when a stump mulcher can do the job better and more cheaply...

Sproactually said...

And to think I still use dish towels.

Sproactually said...

Oh, and why do my comments show up as like 3 AM on your blog??

I'll be in Midtown on Saturday, doing a very geeky train thing at 10AM, should wrap up 12-1230ish,

Can i buy you lunch?

Krissyface said...

Bumble, thank you. Finally, someone with a heart that isn't made of rocks.

Scooter, Farms or no farms, they are still living things. I suppose you have the same argument for cloning. Ugh.

Steve, I don't know what's up with the timing of your comments! Wish we could meet up. Left you a comment on your blog about it!

Kali said...

I don't get it either.