Saturday, June 7, 2008

Plastic-Flavored Waffles

Toaster waffles are yummy. I make them every morning for Lily. I just got the blueberry multigrain variety from Trader Joe's. The toaster is kind of a integral part of my morning ritual. I am just not a mommy who gets up on weekday mornings and flips home made pancakes. If I tried that, in my blind pre-coffee stupor, I'd end up in the burn unit because I'd accidentally set my hands on fire trying to accomplish the task. So, toaster waffles it is.

So the other morning, I pop a waffle into the toaster and go hang in the living room with Lil, clutching my cup of hot caffeinated magic between the knees as I embrace Lily in a couch-cuddle. Ah, calm, quiet morning.

Then there is a smell.

An acrid, chemical, evil smell. Like burning wires. A smell that is just very, very wrong. I run into the kitchen and unplug the toaster. Oh, the horror of what is before me:

Exhibit A: My toaster. Seemingly newish, not broken, not on fire.

Exhibit B: A simple Commerce Bank pen. My house is littered with these, because they are free, and I like free things. So every time I go to the bank, I end up with one.

Exhibit C: Commerce Bank pen in toaster. Still not sure how that happened. But oh, the smell. The awful, awful, smell.


Exhibit D: Offending Commerce Bank Pen after being pried out of toaster with steak knife. (Pen was later put to death in garbage chute...after, of course, enduring lengthy photo session with my new digital camera)

So, the moral of this little tale?
Keep the ceramic pen cup away from the toaster. You never know what might happen.

Trust me on this.

14 comments:

Warped Mind of Ron said...

Hmmm... so pen in toaster = bad. What about poop in a toaster! LOL. Sorry I just couldn't let go of your last post yet.

Sproactually said...

I love garbage chutes, I wish I had one!!

Krissyface said...

Ron, That would just be crappy. OMG I can't let it go either.

Steve, I'll sell you one, cheap. Roaches and Rodents Sold Separately.

Ms Smack said...

How the hell did that happen!

ahahah I know the smell you speak of... it's from the bowels of the earth and can burn your nasal hairs!

I reckon a couch cuddle with Lil sounds better than whisking flour and milk anyday!

Mighty Dyckerson said...

Put a little strawberry jam on that fucker, and you've got yourself a tasty treat!

Krissyface said...

Ms. Smack, I am still trying to figure it out. Maybe the cat did it in protest of not getting any wet food for days.

Dyck, you know, I didn't even think of that. Crunchy, anyway.

Jack said...

She can get by on just one waffle?

jeremy said...

maybe she was trying to teach you a lesson about petty theft.

Chele said...

its weird I always liked the smell of burnt plastic...dunno why

Scooter said...

Blech. Blech, I Say!

Krissyface said...

Jack, She gets one waffle, and she doesn't complain. Or else she gets the hose again.

Jeremy, it isn't stealing if it's free. God, why can't you stop JUDGING ME???!!!!!!

Chele, Really? I never went for it. Gasoline? Now, that is a smell I can really get behind. Mmmm. Gas.

Scoot, yes, blech. I concur.

Jack said...

If you ate something once in a while you mighta found it.

Krissyface said...

Jack, Eating is overrated. Drinking, now, that's quite another story...

Big Momma Pimpalishisness said...

I get up and make a big breakfast every (very rough estimate) Sunday. Of course I refuse to wake up before 11 am on Sundays so I'm generally pretty well functioning.