Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Til death do us part

You cannot get anything past kids.


Tonight Lily and I were getting ready to go out for ice cream, because I'd had a shitty day and needed to self medicate with chocolate sprinkles. Lil asked me for the umpeenth time when I was going to have a baby. I told her, well, sweetie, if I ever do have another baby, it's not going to be for a while. Because who would be the daddy of the baby?

And she said, well, it wouldn't be my daddy. Because you are not married to my daddy anymore.

I said, Yes, sweetie. That's right. I'm not.

We almost made it out of the house alive, but then she snagged me with the 64 thousand dollar question. Like a tranquilizer dart filled with Sodium Penthanol, right to the neck. Goddamn it.

Lily (scrunching up nose, deep in thought): Mama, when you married daddy, didn't you make a promise to stay married forever?


Mom: Well, yes, baby. We did.

Lily: So...why didn't you, then?

Mom (sweating profusely suddenly in armpits.
Is something burning?): Well, baby...see, here's the thing. Grownups sometimes do silly things.

(Here I pause. Choose words carefully, as not to paint father as unfeeling asshole unnecessarily at expense of innocent child, and just to make myself somehow feel better for a second because I'm resentful that these questions always seem to get chucked at me.)

People sometimes make promises and realize that they can't keep those doesn't mean they don't still love each other, or that your dad and I don't love you...we just can't be husband and wife anymore. But we'll always be (gulp) your parents. OK?

Lily: I want rainbow sherbet.

Sounds fucking delish.


Sproactually said...

Sometimes, a reminder of what hurts just comes from the wrong place.

Sounds like you did okay, you earned those sprinkles.

jeremy said...

yeah... who?

Chele said...

Lily always amazes me with the things she says, so innocent and pure. Its funny how kids can suddenly switch from one subject to another...if only grown ups learned how to let go as easily.

Warped Mind of Ron said...

LOL.. reminds me of my niece. She would ask questions that nobody wanted to answer and then if you were lucky or had something shiny to show her you were saved with a distraction. Hope you enjoyed them thar sprinkles.

kay zee said...

Wow, that's heavy

But you reacted with grace and maturity.

Good girl!

Scooter said...

You handled that well, with honesty, candor, and poise.

Good job.

Cindy-Lou said...

I want rainbow sherbet, too.

Slyde said...

yeah, thats gotta be a tough one to field for a little one...

i think you handled it like a champ!

p.s. fellow NY'er here..

Anonymous said...

Wow, your daughter just came out.

Effortlessly Average said...

So your daughter had the same primary question as I did when my wife left, which means either a profound question or I have the mind of a young girl.

Seems to me that while sometimes divorce is necessary, marriage in general isn't considered as sacred as it used to be.

Anywho, I'm going to count how many men post comments here offering to be the baby's father. heh.

Big Momma Pimpalishisness said...

I'm glad my son doesn't ask questions like that because I'd have a very hard time not honestly answering that "your daddy's a shithead."

I do believe that I may have mentioned how 'daddy thinks it's okay to have two girlfriends and that's pretty stupid of him and YOU better never think that having two girlfriends at the same time is an okay thing' at some point.

Oops, my bad.